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This seems to be perhaps the most infernal iPhone feature ever conceived. Are you ready for this shaggy dog answer? osxdaily has an article titled "How to Stop Auto-Playing Music In Car Bluetooth From iPhone." This article only demonstrates how lame this feature is. It gives 8 lame suggestions and no good answer. Among the reader comments to the article is one by "Adam" dated 10/12/19. Adam tells us how we can use the "shortcuts" feature (new in iOS 13) to create an automated action that pauses the music play when your iphone connects to your specific car stereo via BT. 2 of 3 responses say this works. The 3rd comment says this shortcut just gives you a prompt to actually run it. Coincidentally, I just happened to find it tonight. It took me about 20 minutes to figure out the shortcut, but I haven't taken it to the car to try it yet. Good luck to us!
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