Maybe I have weird tastes. After all, my friend and I both positively enjoyed the first "Army of Two" game. I loved the irreverent humor, I loved the camaraderie between the guys, and I loved the idea of pimping my gun. Keep in mind, I did my years in the Army, to include a *lengthy* deployment. And yes, we acted remarkably like those guys in the game, well because we were teenagers with weapons and a mission and a lot of time to kill in between. We had many an inane conversation. It helped pass the time. To see that in video glory was why the first game was fun. They weren't these perfect robots that can breach and clear a room with mechanical precision. That isn't even CLOSE to real life. But I digress, now for the game.
This game could have been awesome. Unfortunately, it feels incredibly unfinished. I played it on a PS3 and I know my machine is capable of a lot more than that. The whole game really just consists of hallways. You can be either in an alley, or building, but the feeling is exactly the same. There isn't anything to look at worth mentioning. All of the environment is completely locked off. You can't use any of it for cover. The graphics themselves are completely lackluster. They look like such a rush job. I shudder to think what the game would have looked like had they kept the original release date *shiver*.
The computer feels/is incredibly brain dead. Both as your partner and as your enemy. There are times when you and your partner have to kill a certain group of enemies quickly or else you lose a bonus thing. With the way it is setup, you will almost always require a certain amount of precision to be successful. The computer is like a bull in a china shop. It doesn't recognize that if you put a silencer on your gun, well, it should probably be doing the same thing. Granted, I played the whole game with a friend, so I didn't really get too acquainted with the computer AI.( I say this because maybe there is a way to stop it from blasting people you are trying to snipe and I just never found out). Though, the only reason I know anything about the computer is because of the disconnects. If you don't have a local friend (I'm so sorry...) then you have to do this completely online and your game will be at the mercy of EA's servers. I suffered through enough random disconnects to say "buyer beware" (They have gotten alot better though). My friend, since he had a faster connection (11mbs, vs my 9.9), would make the game, then invite me. I can't tell you how many times I would watch that golden coin spinning on the load screen for a few minutes only to be told that "XXXX has aborted the game" and then maybe about another 45 seconds after that my friend would get a similar message saying that "XXXX (Me) left the game". We have it working fine now, but I gotta be honest about my experience.
The story is NON EXISTENT. In the first one I at least knew who I was taking down at any given moment. There were these nice little things called *bosses* at the end of the level, which allowed me to kinda keep track of where/what I was doing. No such luck with this one. This part actually kinda makes me mad. I am not one for random shooting and random gameplay. I want to know why I'm doing what I'm doing. All they really had to do was inject a little movie in between levels to maybe show our hero's plans. Instead the story is just what you can catch in bits and pieces from someone talking in your ear as you play the game. Sometimes they talk in the beginning, sometimes they talk at the end of the level, or sometimes they talk in the middle, there really isn't any format. The story deserves no stars. There ARE some collectibles that help flesh out the game. But COME ON! Seriously? You are going to make me SEARCH for some COLLECTIBLE so I can gain JUST A LITTLE more insight about the whole reason why my character is doing what he is doing?!? (Who green-lighted this idea?! Oh and by the way, the collectible may not be in English. So.... yeah have fun) And when it sorta gets explained (really really at the end) I feel they took a page out of MGS' playbook for nonsense. So in a nutshell you are/feel like an unguided missile killing hundreds of people for no reason beyond, "I gotta make it to the end of this hallway!" But its okay because all the characters look alike so you won't feel any real pity for them.
I could really talk a lot more about this, but I'm tired so a quick summary will have to suffice.
Fun minigame with the Paper Rock Scissors thing,
Choosing your mask is fun
Gotta love the new emotes
Weapon customization is out of this world (Lol, putting another gun's magazine on anything else but that gun is laughable though...)
Very very weak story
No way to play this game creatively
Choices have no actual effect on gameplay
The game engine (Unreal 3) seems has tons of potential, but it was truly squandered. But at least there is a possibility of being able to squeeze some greatness there.
Rent this one, or wait for the price to drop (it will). Because of my great experience with the first Army of Two, Army of Two: The Fortieth Day, was a launch day buy for me. After playing that though, Army of Two: The Eightieth Day won't be. I think I am going to wait on the reviews for that one.
*Yes I still recommend it, on the off chance it will help the series to stay alive. You don't have too many buddy games like this with the potential for some awesome sequels*